A man whos hungry for love
Anyone who eats three meals a day should understand why cookbooks outsell sex manuals.Certainly part of that has to do with the fact that you can eat alone, and while driving.Ill go on record right here and now and say I like sex. But if the truth be told, I spend much more time writing about it than I do participating. Im not alone in this matter. Sex has much in common with a Thanksgiving dinner the preparations are much more involved than the meal. I dont mean to sound jaded about the mating ritual, but I do wonder about the mass fascination. I think it is because sex is often withheld from those who want it and imposed on those who dont.We are lousy at love, acccording to the most comprehensive study in 50 years on the sexual practices of Americans, which ran in a recent edition of the Journal of the American Medical Association. Four out of 10 women and 31⁄3 of every 10 men suffer from sexual dysfunction. Symptoms are easy to understand, though the names are a bit confusing: discomfort (dyspareunia), inability to complete the sex act (anorgasmic) and impotence (shooting pool with a rope).Unfortunately, society attempts to persuade us that sex is a measure of our worth, youth and vitality. A person who lives without love is considered a free spirit but one who forgoes sex is thought of as lonely (or a resident of Eagle County).The study also linked sexual dysfunction with a dramatically impaired quality of life. Researchers label it a serious public-health concern. They also fear that they have only scratched the tip of the love-bummer iceberg. Since most people are reluctant to talk about their sexual problems, the numbers could be considerably higher. If the researchers worst fears are true, nearly half of the population is included in the walking wounded of the sexually impaired. They recommend that those who need help seek the services of a sex professional (Im guessing they mean a doctor).The good news is that with the advancements in science and medicines, many boudoir bummers can be cured. And interestingly enough, this is a medical advancement that will benefit the poor and uneducated more than the rich. Another finding of this study reaffirms what most of us already knew: It is more fun being rich. The research found that the poor and uneducated make bad love. To be more specific, college-educated men were 28 percent less likely to suffer from poor performance than those who didnt complete high school. And the shocker was that female college graduates are twice as likely to be enthusiastic partners than high school drop-outs. (It is only a matter of time before the school boards seize this statistic as a means to strengthen stay-in-school campaigns.)Another add-insult-to-injury finding was that often the lower a mans income, the lower his libido. The unemployed and poorly paid have a much higher rate of impotence than those with high incomes and good jobs. (Reason enough to tax the rich.)The specialists made clear that not every person requires physical love to be happy. Rather, they found that many people who are celibate remain so by choice and with contentment. But they were equally clear that those who desire an active love life and suffer from the various hindrances experience a drastically diminished quality of life. In a nutshell: If you dont want it, you really dont need it; if you need it and cant have it, youre miserable. It is a lot like being a Denver Broncos fan. They only make you unhappy if your happiness depends on them winning the Super Bowl.The studys final observation was that sexual dysfunction is most prevalent in women between the ages of 18 and 29 while men suffer most in their mid-50s. Since Ill soon be in my mid-50s, that statistic got my attention.With science and medicine reaching new horizons, its lucky for my generation that there is hope that all aforementioned conditions might be cured by the time we reach the danger zone. In the meantime, Im buying some cookbooks.Jeffrey Bergeron, under the alias of Biff America, can be seen on RSN-TV and read in several newspapers and magazines. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Biffs book, Steep, Deep and Dyslexic, is available from local bookstores or at http://www.backcountrymagazine.com.