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Blindness comes in black and white

Tamara Miller

Beware of the L-word.

These days, it ranks higher on the mother-of-all-insults scale than the A-word, the B-word and, depending upon who’s using it, the S-word. (The F-word is still the reigning champion, at least until network television starts bleeping it out.)

Being called foolish, ignorant and stupid doesn’t even compare to being called the L-word. Call yourself the L-word and you might hear people gasp.

There was a day and age when being a liberal – there, I said it – meant good things. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, being a liberal means you favor “civil and political liberties, democratic reforms and protection from arbitrary authority.” Historically, it meant you supported the women’s movement, the civil rights movement, and public education.

It meant you were forward-thinking. It meant you were a critical thinker. It meant that you respected people of different faiths, or people who didn’t have a faith. It meant that you helped people who were less fortunate than you.

Now being a liberal means you want everyone to be gay, that you want to make wealthy, successful people poor and destitute crackheads unaccountable. It means you want everyone to have abortions.

Don’t think building a border fence is a good idea? You’re a liberal. And as such, you want the United States to be taken over by illegal immigrants with total legal immunity.

Don’t want intelligent design to be taught in the science classroom? You’re a liberal. And that means you hate God and anyone who worships God.

Why hasn’t the dictionary captured this new definition? It’s behind in other areas, too. Take the word, Christian, for example.

Did you know that being a Christian not only means you follow the teachings of Jesus Christ, but that you want everyone to following the teachings of Jesus Christ, too?

Being a Christian means that you don’t believe in evolution. It also means you want to put Christmas trees in schools, offices, airplanes and restaurants.

Being a Christian means you think accepting homosexuals will ruin society. It not only means you are against abortion, but you are also against birth control, sex education and working women.

There was a time when being a Christian meant that you helped the poor, victimized and the sick. Now, being a Christian means you are a conservative. And we all know what that means when it comes to illegal Mexican workers. (They’re ruining our country. Send them all back!)

Being a Christian means you agree with President Bush. It means you never question authority, that you support the war in Iraq and that you want religion taught in public schools. It also means you are a patriot, unlike those America-hating liberals.

Maybe someone should start a public education campaign to inform Americans about these new definitions, and others, because right now I know plenty of people who are breaking the rules.

I know of a woman who supports gay rights, low taxes, the war in Iraq and attends a Catholic Church. Boy, did she miss the memo.

I know of a man who calls himself an atheist. He also opposes affirmative action, believes a crackdown on illegal immigration will derail our economy and couldn’t care less if two men got married, as long as they don’t make him sing Alleluia when he attends the wedding ceremony. He is a registered Republican, (a.k.a a fundamentalist wacko).

I know of a Democrat who disagrees with President Bush almost as passionately as she disagrees with the pro-choice coalition. To which, one has to ask: which is it? Are you an immigrant-loving pushover or a Bible-beating war-mongerer?

Did you know the Vatican came out against the American war on Iraq? So are they liberals or Christians? How confusing.

A little enlightenment could go a long way here. VT

Tamara Miller can be reached for comment at tmiller@vailtrail.com.


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