Carnes: A trail, by any other name … |

Carnes: A trail, by any other name …

VAIL, Colorado –Pepi has a face, so does Milt. Simba has a run, Ricky has a ridge, Dobson has an arena, Donovan has a park, Ford has an amphitheater and a garden, and now Lindsey has a trail.

What’s the big deal?

It’s not like Vail Resorts is trying to call anything Vonn Valley or Vonn Village, as doing so would be way too obvious of a marketing gimmick, even to those who bought a box of Wheaties last week.

Each of the above names were selected for various land parcels on public property, all owned or leased by either a public corporation or a public township.

For the most part, they can call whatever they want whatever they want, although the possibility always exists for public outrage if the name selected is controversial, such as renaming Chambers Avenue in Eagle “ERS Boulevard.”

But that is, of course, a hypothetical example.

(By the way, just think of all the poor kids named after O.J. Simpson.)

Besides, it’s not as if the Vonn family donated six figures in order to have Lindsey’s name put on the trail and then forced Vail Resorts to sign a contract stating in the event of any unforeseen future legal issues (i.e., fraud convictions) that the name could not be changed again without a six-figure refund.

That would just be silly (not to mention highly unethical).

And it was a fairly obvious strategic move by Katz and Co. for using “Lindsey” as opposed to “Vonn,” especially with Happy Valley’s decidedly unhappy divorce rate. Although I too admire and respect Mrs. Vonn for everything she has done for the sport, the one thing surrounding us both is reality.

You want to award a local for going ridiculously fast for an extended period of time and winning the pinnacle event in their sport? How about five top-5 finishes, including two seconds and one first place at more than 230 mph?

Vail’s born and bred Buddy Lazier, 1996 Indianapolis 500 winner, would certainly qualify.

Or how about four-time U.S. Olympian alpine ski racer and local Sarah Schleper?

With Lindsey receiving a trail, I can easily envision a Buddy Boulevard or Lazier Lane somewhere in Vail proper, along with a highly technical ski run called “Sarah’s.”

Yes, I realize the semantics between Vail Resorts and the town of Vail, but everybody always claims the two entities are in bed together concerning most issues anyway, so although it’s probably safe to assume that each uses proper protection while in the midst of doing the act (of naming things, I mean), I see no reason why they can’t both jump on the renaming bandwagon at the same time.

Either way, if you still want to call it “International,” then by all means, feel free. It’s not as if locals go out of their way to say “Vail Square” instead of the traditional “Lionshead.”

But I must say that there is something, how should I put this, not quite right, about a tourist bragging he “fell about halfway down Lindsey and didn’t stop until slamming head first into Pepi’s face.”

Richard Carnes, of Edwards, writes a column for the Daily. He can be reached at Comment on

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