Don’t freeze that frog! | VailDaily.com
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Don’t freeze that frog!

Happy birthday, Tanner Moller! We love you! Jill and Martha and all your friends at Mountain Montessori!
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We know what you were thinking: You have some pet frogs that your kid convinced you to buy, and they made baby frogs and you’re like: “What the hell do I do with all these extra frogs?”

If you paid any attention to a recent press release from the Colorado Division of Wildlife, you might have determined that freezing the unwanted amphibians is the correct course of action. (Although, chances are, you did NOT see this press release because even though we get a bazillion press releases a week from CDOW, we couldn’t find this one.) But, in another press release (one that we actually did receive), the Division of Wildlife says that we should NOT freeze our spare frogs, nor should we release them into local ponds or wetlands because they are non-native species that will disrupt the ecosystem and cause the riparian areas (which is enviro-geek-speak for “wet, swampy areas”) to convulse, thus culminating in the demise of the entire Earth As We Know It.

The stakes are high here, folks. According to the news release that we did get, non-native, unfrozen frogs can carry terrible-sounding diseases such as – and we are not fabricating this information – chytridiomycotic fungus and rana virus. And if you can pronounce that first one to your own satisfaction, buy yourself a latte.

So, you are now understandably still asking yourself : “What the hell do I do with all these extra frogs?” The DOW is a little vague on this question, other than to say you shouldn’t freeze them or dump them in local ponds. What you should do, they say, is “do thorough research before acquiring any animals for captive possession” and “make sure you are ready, willing, and able to properly care for them.”

Which is basically saying either don’t get frogs in the first place, or have them practice celibacy.

Good luck with that one.

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