DVD Scene | VailDaily.com

DVD Scene

Know that feeling when you get to the rental store and you can’t remember the movie that you wanted to see? Well, tear this out and take it with you – here’s our staffers’ list of movies to watch, and movies that are so bad it’s hard to believe they were made in the first place.

This is one of those classic Steve Martin flicks which should be required viewing for anyone who wants American citizenship. Well, perhaps that’s going too far, but we think that this kind of slapstick, uber-stupid comedy should be held in the highest esteem. As over-the-top moronic as Martin’s character is, there are still people in our real lives who resemble “The Jerk” far too often (No, we’re not talking about you … but what about that guy sitting on your right?)

The answer to so many people’s problems seems to be a quick diagnosis and a prescription of pills. In this movie we are reminded that people have been f’d up since the beginning of time, but only recently have we begun dealing with our own f’d-upness by responding in even more f’d up ways. The eyecandy comes in the form of Christina Ricci, who plays an ivy-league hottie who can afford to blame her problems on a so-called “illness.” If you like the subject matter, try the book – a well-written piece by Elizabeth Wurtzel with the same title.

This movie has all the trappings of a high-quality race-and-politics drama on par with The Mighty Quinn and Dry White Season. Samuel Jackson and Juliette Binoche play the starring roles, and the trailer promises stories of the who, what, where, why, and how of South Africa’s dark past. Unfortunately, the “trappings” turn into a trap: the movie is one long saga with no climax and little to look forward to. The only redeeming factor? This is one of the few movies in existence which includes a bi-racial romance.

This movie borders on the unwatchable, but it’s so bad that it’s almost good. Plus, this is where we get to see Keanu Reeves perform the only role he’s really qualified to play (Excellent! Party On!). Bill and Ted’s became kind of a cult flick, but if you’re not in that cult, don’t bother wasting your time.

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Some people may think that we rank these reviews in order of best to worst, but in fact we don’t – we just number them because that’s what people do these days. Anyway, if we were to rank this movie, it’d be No. 1, not No. 5, so don’t let our numerological inabilities fool you.

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