MugShots: To-do list
Some of my goals are boring, mundane stuff. A few are wildly exciting. Most of them are the self-important ramblings of a sleep-deprived copy editor. But hey, self-important ramblings are pretty much the definition of a blog, right? So heres my to-do list. Id like to see the interrobang become a standard, widely used punctuation mark. Whats an interrobang? Its a combination exclamation/question mark for all those times you need to convey excited puzzlement. It kind of looks like this: ‽. Way more interesting than the plain old exclamation point, right?Id like to convince the town of Vail to change that sign at the transportation center that refers to busses. I cant even remember what the rest of the sign says. Busses means kisses, though. I think the sign manufacturers were going for buses. Id like to popularize group names for copy editors. For instance, theres a pack of wolves, a covey of quail, a skulk of foxes, etc. With copy editors, Im leaning toward either a superiority of copy editors or a smugness of copy editors. If the copy editors are on deadline, though, they would become, depending on their temperaments, either a tizzy of copy editors or a surliness of copy editors. Id like to tell George Thorogood and The Destroyers that its whom do you love? not who do you love? Usually Im clueless/scornful/indifferent when it comes to music, but Mr. Thorogood created and played on a semipro baseball team in Delaware, so he cant be all bad. Unless hes a Yankees fan. Then he is all bad. Speaking of baseball, Id like to see the Blue Jays finish higher than third in my lifetime. I thought this was going to be the year, but now Im not so sure. A playoff berth would be nice, but after watching them drop two of three to the Mariners, Id settle for higher than third. Baby steps. Id like to convince whoevers in charge of these things that the seven wonders of the ancient world are in need of some revision to make them a bit less European-centric. Always bothered me. Id like to write the Great American Blog. Itd be like the Great American Novel only all about me, kind of boring and filled with typos and sloppy writing. I would say that Id like to copy edit the Great American Novel, but The Onion beat me to that one. Id like to eat just potatoes for the rest of my life. When I started at the Daily, all anyone ever saw me eat was potatoes. There was a bit of a rumor I was on a potato diet. Speaking of potatoes, though, Id like to hold some sort of competitive eating record, and the french fry record looks doable: 4.46 pounds in six minutes, according to the International Federation of Competitive Eatings Web site. I think I have a better chance at that one than eating seven quarter-pound sticks of butter in five minutes. Im a little hungry, so Id like to finish this blog so I could cook me some potatoes right now. However, Id also like to end on a high note, and the last two-thirds of this blog have been boring even me, and I normally love the sound of my own blog voice. Id like to have a pet Ewok. It could walk with me to work, and if I needed to ask reporters questions after they left for the day, my Ewok buddy could track them down and ask them. Way more civilized than the phone. Id like to end on a different note so as not to look like such a Star Wars nerd, but I cant really think of anything.