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Paris Hiltons iPhone

Paris exiting jail chatting on her new iPhone: That would be a perfect photo for todays media world, where slavish attention is focused on the trivial while the greater questions are relegated to the fringe.Alas, the releases of Paris and the iPhone were off by a couple of days, robbing us of this potent, lucrative image. Were left instead with the gnawing question keeping us up nights as to why Paris Hilton is supposed to be consuming our thoughts even when she doesnt. This is paired with anxiety over the roadblocks to the iPhone: We dont want to switch to AT&T and pay Verizon a $200 early termination fee, and we dont have $500 for a flippin phone!Of course, we are adding to the media frenzy by writing about these two subjects, but we hope to simultaneously exonerate ourselves by acknowledging such. By doing so, we also run the risk of diluting our own self-exoneration (a Class II misdemeanor in Kansas, by the way), but were willing to do so in the hopes that, by adding multiple instances of Paris Hilton and iPhone on our online version, we will score greater Google ratings which in turn will help us sell newspapers. Or whatever.The point is this:(Editors note: This op-eds point was deleted either for space considerations or by a restraint order issued by the U.S. Department of Justice acting under clandestine instructions by the office of the Vice President of the United States.)All of which is to say that Paris Hilton is, like the iPhone, a perfect summer diversion, when hot weather can sizzle our syntaxes enough to make thoughts about heavy issues ranging from Darfur to Baghdad almost impossible to parse. We want grape Kool-Aid, not a complex Burgundy; James Pattersons latest novel, not Thomas Pynchons.In 20 years time, when Steve Jobs is controlling our brains through iPhones Bluetooth/cerebral cortex interface and Hilton is governor of California, we can blame it all on the media and that period of intellectual incuriosity that seemed to peak in the summer of 07. Alex Miller for the Editorial Board


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