Quick steps to avoid psycho love
Everything they say starts to grate on your nerves; their jokes, stories, questions you name it. Is it the tone of their voice, the look on their face or just the idiotic things that are coming out of their mouth that is about to make you pull your hair out? Ahhh the first signs of a break-up.The question is, what flipped that switch in you that made you realize that you are with the WRONG person? Had you been kidding yourself all along, blocking out these annoying qualities? Were you truly in love and suddenly YOU changed? Or did the person you were dating truly wake up one morning transformed into the most annoying person you’ve ever met? My guess is that you were protecting yourself, for whatever reasons, from seeing these not-so-favorable qualities until you couldn’t take it any more. So in an effort to prevent this from happening the next time around, here are the Rules of Elimination, to help you weed out the wrong person from the get-go.Rule No. 1: The InterviewConsider the dating process as an interview. This is your chance to figure out if you’re compatible with someone. Just as an employer tries to find the right employee for their company, you are trying to find the right person for you. So ask away. Everything from political views to sexual fantasies; get it all out on the table so that you know what you’re dealing with.Rule No. 2: SituationsIt’s very important to take notice of how someone handles different situations. A party where they don’t know anyone, a night out with you and all of their best friends, a work function where the pressure is on, a lazy Sunday with nothing to do, or traveling through a country where they don’t speak the language. These are all great indicators of who a person is and how they deal with the world.Rule No. 3: Common InterestsThis isn’t as simple as figuring out that one of you likes to play football while the other likes to shop for shoes. Men and women by nature have different interests, but make sure that there is some common ground. Do you enjoy some of the same sports, discussing current events or reading next to one another on the couch? Just make sure that your only common interest isn’t sex. Healthy relationships need a lot more than that.Rule No. 4: RespectNow respect is something that is earned over time, but there are clear indicators as to whether you will not respect someone down the road. If you question someone’s intelligence, are you going to respect their opinion? If the person you are dating compromises their beliefs or acts in a way that compromises yours, will you respect them? Think about the person that you’re dating, are you proud of them and eager for people to associate you with them? If not, you may want to quit while you’re ahead.So, to those of you who fall head-over-heels in “love” without ever stopping to think about who the person truly is (you know who you are) slow down. Take some time to think things through and make sure you go over the Rules of Elimination before you wake up one day and realize that you’re married, or seriously committed, to the WRONG person.Crystal Clear is a socially savvy Vail native who brings a candid female’s opinion and pointers to The Vail Trail. Crystal would love to hear your opinions at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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