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Remember: ‘I am heaven’

Kelly Major Heath
Vail, CO Colorado

You took your kids next door to play with the neighbors’ kids. You turned off your cell phone. You even dimmed the lights in the living room. With your favorite book, you sit down on the couch all by yourself to finally relax. You’ve been waiting for this all day. You open the book, read the first sentence on the page, and, then out of no where, the doorbell rings. DAMN! The perfect relaxing scenario vanishes.

Sound familiar? You cannot control your external circumstances. But you spend most of your life trying to perfect everything around you, to make everything just right so that you can then finally relax, be at ease and happy. As soon as the bank account shows the right number, as soon as our partner does this, as soon as I accomplish that, as soon as I have this, as soon as I eat that … then, I’ll finally be happy.

Many of us in the Valley had a good friend pass away recently. Allan Goldberg lived with cancer for most of his life. During the last year and a half he underwent a big round of chemotherapy and radiation. Though his body was clearly not in an ideal place, what I will remember most about Allan is that he was always happy, positive and optimistic.



John Lennon said: “Life is what happens to us while we are busy making other plans.” Life isn’t always what we expect it to be, whether it’s cancer or just simply a change in our plans. And, yet we spend so much of our time and energy trying to control, change, or influence the external circumstances rather than just relaxing with what is. Allan had the very special gift of shifting his focus from the uncontrollable external to the calm, peaceful serenity of the internal.

When I need to remember that I am OK right where I am, I simply say to myself “I am Heaven.” It’s my way of remembering that heaven is not a place to wait for, or get to. It’s a place I have now. And it’s a simple change in my perspective from the external to the internal. It reminds me to connect with my silly, lighter, go with the flow self … and that takes me right into my paradise.

Participate in The Longevity Project

The Longevity Project is an annual campaign to help educate readers about what it takes to live a long, fulfilling life in our valley. This year Kevin shares his story of hope and celebration of life with his presentation Cracked, Not Broken as we explore the critical and relevant topic of mental health.



For Allan, find cloud nice today. Your paradise. Your ecstasy. Really, why shouldn’t you? Why shouldn’t right now be absolutely everything you need? Why can’t it be? And, if it’s not, start to realize you might be a lot like me ” sometimes we need to go through a process of beating our heads against the wall. And, for some of us, we need that process to help bring us back to the heaven that was/is always there. And to simply realize it is very simple: I can have happiness if I choose to have it now.

Heaven lives inside of us somewhere ” we just have to find a way to bring it out.

We don’t need someone else to do it for us. Not our partners. Not our jobs. Not our bank accounts. Not shopping, overeating, alcohol or other things that we do tend to look toward. Not even picture-perfect health. It’s just simply: “I am Heaven.” You are the person you’ve been looking for. You are the place you’ve been looking for. You are everything you already need. You are exactly the way you should be and exactly who you are.


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