Sex in the City?
Guys you’ve just started dating this new hot girl. You’ve gone on a few dates and now you’re back at your place with every intention of hooking up. The girl is clearly digging you and wants more than just a good-night kiss. You start to put the moves on and suddenly she stops and asks if you have condoms and a dental dam. SCREECH everything comes to a sobering halt. A what?! She’s just asked for WHAT was that last thing? A dental WHAT?!Not only have you never heard of this thing, but you can’t begin to imagine what it looks like. Without seeming terribly shocked you quickly try to figure out what this girl would possibly want with a dental dam and how you’re going to get one. Stumped, you finally ask her and get an answer that scares you away from ever wanting to hook up again in your life. This girl has just violated a norm of casual hook-ups. Yep, she broached the subject of STD’s. While quite responsible, this is about the last thing anyone would want to think about before making out. The problem is if we don’t bring it up and make requests to use protection, we have about a 70 percent chance of catching one of these not-so-fun diseases. Although some of them may not be life-threatening or dangerous, I sure as heck don’t want to be battling a case of crabs or genital warts. I can barely speak the words let alone think that I could have such ugly sounding things.So the real question is, “How do we stay safe without sounding ridiculous and scaring everyone off”? Abstinence from ANY sexual activity is the only way to guarantee that you won’t catch something. Come on, we all know that’s not so realistic, so here are a few Healthy Hook-up Tactics that could help you avoid getting an STD.HH Tactic No. One: Ease intothe STD topicIn a light-hearted way start some dialog about whether or not the two of you have ever been tested for any STD’s, when the last time was, both of your thoughts on getting tested regularly, etc. You don’t want them to run for the hills after your date – convinced that your interest in the subject stems from having every STD under the sun. You just want them to know that you are conscious of the risks. No need to dwell on the subject, just bring it up. Possible lead-in line: “So I was reading this article on STD’s the other day and didn’t realize how common they are. Have you ever gotten tested?”HH Tactic No. Two: Find out about sexual historyNo smart individual is going to reveal that they have had years of promiscuous sex with loads of sketchy people if they want to have any chance at getting you into bed. So you’re going to have to do some of your own investigative work. How many significant (dated for more than one year) relationships has the person had? How old were they when they lost their virginity? How many people have they had sex with (the answer probably won’t be truthful but just see what number they throw out)? All of these questions will better help you assess their sexual history. After asking them directly, ask mutual friends about their past and see what other info you can dig up. Remember, if you are planning on having a sexual relationship with someone, you have the right to know about their sexual history. So find out whether it be through them, mutual friends or talk around town.HH Tactic No. Three: Use protectionIf you’re throwing caution to the wind and are going to have a casual hook-up, at least make sure that you use a condom if having sex. Also, know that you can catch things such as genital crabs and warts by mere genital contact. Yep, just getting naked together can be dangerous! Not that I’m suggesting a full-body condom, but just know who you’re getting naked with.Well, if I haven’t scared you into celibacy, be careful out there and conscious of how you can protect yourself. I don’t want to see you itching those crabs!Crystal Clear is a socially savvy Vail native who brings a candid female’s opinion and pointers to the Vail Trail. Crystal would love to hear your opinions at email@example.com.
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