Three cheers for Rumsfeld’s resignation |

Three cheers for Rumsfeld’s resignation

Dana Jurich

Christmas came early this year! In lieu of toys, Santa gifted the people the resignation of Public Enemy No. 2: Donald Rumsfeld. After angering 90 percent of Americans with his ruthless approach to many aspects of war and “defense,” the Secretary of Defense has finally been handed his hat.Donald is no stranger to war. A politician for over four decades, Don is still advocating war and beefing up our weapons like he had for the Ford and Nixon administrations. Most recently, much of our taxpayers dollars were siphoned off of public education, health care, and environmental protection to the Department of Defense. The total budget for defense this past year was $420 billion dollars, a whopping 19 percent of the total budget. Obviously, we’ve got to protect ourselves from evil and badness, and not just on the land, but underwater and out in space.The Rumsfeld Space Commission he’s put into action was convincing enough to the present administration that we needed desperately to send weapons into the heavens. The entire world is pretty upset about the whole thing, and rightfully so. If we send up missiles, lasers and space bombs, then it will trigger a race to weaponize space, something the entire world (except for us) is opposed to. Indeed, it will be like giving our international neighbors the finger, furthering our global image as an unreasonable, volatile jerk who answers to no one. That’s no way to make friends. But then, that wasn’t Donald’s concern. In fact, he was and still is sure that instead of us answering to the world, the world should answer to us. Does somebody have a control issue?We have been tripping over ourselves to increase production of weapons of mass destruction, but will destroy any other country that we feel doesn’t deserve them. He’ll even invent facts to complete his ambitions. Some of the most notable include, but are definitely not limited to: Saddam and Al-Qaeda were, without a shadow of a doubt, inextricably linked. He and his bud in the mud, Dick Cheney (with whom he has closely worked in and around DC for many, many years) successfully convinced gullible George and the rest of America that an invasion was absolutely necessary to destroy this “axis of evil.” Eventually the world found out (a little late) that there is no connection between Saddam and Osama, and never was. Donald wobbled a bit, but didn’t falter; he had a backup whopper, which he served to The People wearing a Pinocchio costume: Saddam and Iraq had, for sure this time, weapons of mass destruction. He even used a few exaggerated hand gestures to emphasize his point in his State of the Union address. Once again, we bought it and continued to support the inconsistent “cause.” Now that the cat is out of the bag as to our real motives (gosh, we’re pretty slow at this), Bush has lost his support for his war. I think the clincher was when America found out that good old Donald was the guy who signed off on the use of torture in the U.S.-controlled prisons overseas. When hellacious photos were released to the media, coupled with first-hand accounts of the treatment of our prisoners, Donald’s pale face turned beet red for a moment, and he played dumb. This is my favorite part: When he was asked about why he “didn’t know” the extent of the treatment there, he uhh-ed and err-ed and told the reporter “I think I did request photos, but they told me there weren’t any copies.” BUSTED! Thankfully, Donald has been given the big heave-ho. I for one, and millions more like me, won’t be missing him. I think the administration was a bit embarrassed by the blatant lies, and needed a scapegoat who wielded plenty of power. They probably figured that Donnie, who is well past the average retirement age must be going senile. Well, it’s time for fresh blood in the office, both for spilling and for recirculating. Hope the new guy isn’t nearly as – how do I put this? – horrible.Dana Jurich of Avon writes a weekly column for the Daily. Send comments or questions to Daily, Vail, Colorado CO

Support Local Journalism