Vail Daily columnist Richard Carnes: Dump the chump Trump |

Vail Daily columnist Richard Carnes: Dump the chump Trump

Donald Trump will never be president of the United States.

Quite the news flash, I know, but apparently a few of our fellow brethren out there in, well, actually, I don’t know where or really care as long as it’s far from here, but they actually believe he could be the next leader of the Free World.

And I thought Scientologists were delusional.

Most of them, like Trump, are “Birthers” (the Diet Coke of conspiracy theorists – all hype, no taste), who claim in spite of all evidence proving otherwise that Obama was not born in America and therefore must immediately give up his crown of president and move back to Kenya – post haste.

Like Bill O’Reilly questioning the tides, these are the kind of people who would send out a mass email denying the existence of the Internet.

They live by innuendo, supposition, half-truths and conclusions based on guesswork and personal desires. Their deductions are presupposed while they tailor “facts” to justify their foregone conclusions, which they then repeat ad nauseam as truths. The vast majority of them belong to the GOP (Grumpy Old Party), which does not bode well for the integrity of our next election cycle.

I realize majority rules and all, but Republicans are spending the majority of their time on abortion, gay marriage and this birthing nonsense, as if those are the top three most pressing issues in today’s America. And Donald Trump is milking these pandering udders of delusion for the rest of the world to see. They’re laughing so hard the milk is squirting out their Third World noses.

Trump seems to seriously think he can stand atop the public stage and be vague and coy about his newfound positions and then receive praise for each. The man believes he is somehow privileged, through birth or perhaps just by pretending to be a conservative, in that he does not have to explain himself in depth to other conservatives because they just “get it,” as if they all belong to some Dan Brown-inspired secret society.

Not only is this the mark of true arrogance, but are clearly the thoughts and actions of a dangerously disturbed individual bordering on severe psychosis.

He is living out Sean Hannity’s dream.

Glenn Beck sits down, The Donald stands up.

What a joke.

Any day now, just watch, he will announce a lifelong commitment to Christianity that he has been secretly hiding from the rest of the world all this time because he believed it was a personal issue, but now the world deserves to know where his heart truly stands.

While many will pretend to fall for it, the rest of us will be reaching for the barf bags.

Like Sarah Palin, this chump is not a cultural phenomenon, but a cultural embarrassment.

The sooner the GOP dumps his pretend campaign, they can move forward towards someone – anyone – with more depth than this superficial cheeseball.

At best, Trump’s jump could give Obama the bump to climb out of his slump, thus making it much harder for the GOP to make it over their own hump in 2012.

Richard Carnes of Edwards writes weekly. He can be reached at Comment on

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