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Welcome to Town Talk

Someone like us.

Movin’ straight into it.

Ice skating scum alert

We got a call from Eagle, to which the scum has apparently spread. A young lad was at his first hockey practice at Eagle Town Park, where they’ve constructed a pretty cool ice rink. When hockey practice was over, the lad’s pair of skateguards had been stolen. The skateguards are red, the same color as the bad karma that’s bearing down on you.

Not so quick on the California Howdy

Ray Cheeseman has a legitimate beef with fellow motorists, most of whom should be backhanded. His young son had surgery Thursday, and was released at around 3 p.m. As they were driving home toward Edwards, the boy started gagging, stopped breathing and turned blue. Ray spun the car around in the I-70 median and started streaking back to the hospital in Vail, trying to get there before his son died. As he weaved through traffic, honking his horn, flashing his lights and waving his arms to get drivers to make enough room for him to get through, more than one bonehead flipped him off and refused to move.

Don’t do that. It’s not only indicative of your I.Q., it’s a perfectly good excuse to come over to your house with every intention of employing a “thinkin’ stick.” For the uninitated, a thinkin’ stick is about the size of a pool cue and comes with very simple instructions: “Apply firmly and repeatedly upside the knothead’s noggin until their attitude, and the situation, improves.”

Ray’s son is fine, no thanks to all the bird flippers.

Brilliance among us

n Sheryl Newman of Vail earned her Masters Degree in visual arts from the University of Northern Colorado.

n Local author Doris Ladd is serving as a member of the Syracuse University College of Arts and Sciences Board of Visitors. Ladd is a Syracuse grad. It says here that Ladd serves as an “advocate for the college and provides counsel and expertise to the Dean of the College in order to bring alumni and educational leaders closer to the college and its students.” Basically, it sounds like Ladd gets to help boss around the Dean and arrange Syracuse University’s gigantic Human Be-In.

Get literate, help others

The Literacy Project is looking for volunteers to help with adults and middle school students. The Literacy Project is a free tutoring program and requires volunteers to meet with their student two hours each week. Call 949-5026 and ask for Sloan.

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