What a difference a ‘E’ makes | VailDaily.com
YOUR AD HERE »

What a difference a ‘E’ makes

Compiled by Allen R. Smith

Toward the end of the season, I was assigned a private lesson with a high-powered couple from the West Coast. Each of them were explosive and argumentative professionals, used to having people cater to their every demand. Instead of waiting to rent their equipment at the resort, they assumed that they would be ahead of the game by renting their skis, boots and poles from a shop in Salt Lake City.After cordial introductions, the three of us boarded the tram and headed for the top. When we arrived at our destination, we grabbed our equipment and prepared for our first run down.The first inkling of trouble came when the gentleman tried to click into his bindings. The bindings had obviously been adjusted for a boot much smaller than his.Compounding the situation, his wife’s skis had been adjusted for a boot that was far bigger than hers. This immediately sparked a heated argument between the two, each one blaming the other for not checking the equipment before they left the shop.With their day ruined, they hopped back on the tram and headed down to the bottom. They loaded up their equipment and drove all the way back to Salt Lake City. The gentleman stormed into the ski shop and demanded to speak with the manager. He dressed him up one side and down the other, blaming his staff for ruining an expensive vacation.The manager attempted to defuse the situation by asking what was wrong. The gentleman got hotter and hotter as he explained how some “moron” had mis-adjusted not only his bindings, but his wife’s as well.The manager stopped the man in mid-sentence and asked, “Is your name Louis?” The man nodded. “Is your wife’s name Louise?” Again, the man said yes.”You have each other’s skis.”- Steve Bagley, Park City, UtahSurprise under every helmetA number of years ago when kids starting routinely wearing helmets, a client and I were taking the short hop from chair 12 to the Vista Bahn. As we traversed across the hill, I commented to my client, “Hey, look at those two little kids with the great big helmets. They look like two bowling balls on skis.”A few minutes later, we entered the lift line to the Vista Bahn and as luck would have it, the two kids with the large helmets took the seats to the left of us. Just after the lift took off, I leaned over to the nearest kid and in my most childish, sappy voice, asked him, “How old are you, little fella?”Out from under the helmet, came a reply in a deep, masculine voice, “Forty.” The two “kids” were midgets.I’ve traveled greater distances, but that was the longest chairlift ride I’ve ever taken.- Bob Gagne, VailVail, Colorado


Support Local Journalism