You and me and the GOP |

You and me and the GOP

Randy Wyrick
A self portrait of ex-PFC campers and counselors, Mark B & Jimmy ' Tea'. They actually remembered to set their clocks ahead to catch first tracks at the Top of the Avanti Express at 7:45, Sunday morning.

Real estate magnate Dave Liniger dropped out of the senate race, leaving Randy “The Titans of Town Talk” and Bob Shaypher/Schafer/Sheiphur to carry the GOP banner against Democrat Ken Salazar to represent The People of Colorado in the United State Senate.

Dave is one of the High Sheriffs in RE/MAX real estate, and one of our personal heroes because he has his own golf course. When his wife was banged up a few years back, he built a whole new set of tees to accommodate her. That, my fellow travelers, is true love. The RE/MAX balloon was also his brainchild, which is a dandy idea.

Not as good as the Torque and Recoil campaign platform, but still pretty cool.

The problem with balloons is that they don’t generate enough torque and recoil to steer very well. Also, like presidential hopeful John Kerry, hot air balloons tend to go whichever way the prevailing wind blows.

The best thing about owning your own golf course is that par is whatever you say it is. In the immortal words of the Great Willie Nelson, who also owns his own golf course, “See that hole right there? It’s a par 18. Just yesterday I birdied that sucker.”

However, Dave’s decision to play his personal back nine means that Wyrick’s senate slogan – “Wyrick: The Voice of Reason?!?” – takes on an entirely new importance – mostly because Bob Shaypher/Schafer/Sheiphur is so far right wing he makes Limbaugh look liberal.

Because the GOPers have been so busy kissing up to Dave, chances are they haven’t really come to realize that they have the perfect candidate for The Rest of Us – and that’s pretty much everybody. It also means our chances of getting a ride in the RE/MAX balloon are fading like Average Joe’s real name, which is, uh … the one he was born with.

Hence, The Titans’ Torque and Recoil Campaign gains new traction in our drive for the senate.

Remember, If It has Torque, Recoil, Compression, Makes a Big Bang or Shoots a Big Bullet, It’s Cool and America needs more of it.

Bridge out

If you’re accustomed to taking Highway 24 to and from Leadville, you can’t get there from here. The Red Cliff Arch Bridge is closed, and will stay that way for the foreseeable future. They’re get rid of 4,000 cubic yards of concrete using 30 dump trucks, four large excavators, four huge diesel powered concrete saws and 15 really tough guys working 400 feet above the river with no net and no guardrail. We have declared this the Official Bridge Building Project of Wyrick’s Torque and Recoil Campaign.

And detouring through Red Cliff isn’t really an option. Delays are 30 minutes, which is long enough to reconsider your priorities in life. Go up Highway 91 by Copper Mountain.

Heads Up

Wally, owner of Hairdudes, is having shoulder surgery. She’ll be out of six weeks, or so. Saturday April 10 is the last chance to get that “Hey Baby!” look she’s been giving the foxes in the valley she’s been giving for the last 25 years. If you don’t get it she looks forward to seeing you in June, if not sooner.

Birthday Brigade

Happy birthday to Randy Dickson, from your friends.

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