How dare you say that
“How dare you make fun of the GOP!”
“I said how dare you toss derogatory remarks towards Republicans at their convention!”
Um… OK, where should I toss ‘em?
“At the Democr — wait, I see what you did there. You’re trying to make me sound like a hypocrite by demanding the flip side of an argument is always worse than my side.”
“But your editorials are always so damn slanted.”
Editorials are written by editors and usually reflect an official stance on specific subjects. I write a weekly commentary. It’s my opinion on stuff.
“Well your opinion usually sucks.”
Then why do you keep reading it?
“Because every once in a while I agree with you.”
“But this time you’ve gone too far. You made fun of Chris Christie, Ben Carson and Rudy Giuliani without giving their remarks any context whatsoever. You just made your silly little comments and moved on without any concern for the damage it might cause.”
You mean like Donald Trump does on a daily basis?
“That’s not funny.”
It is to me.
“And you always slam religion — this time you even made fun of Islam being known as the “religion of peace.”
Why yes, yes I did. If you know anything at all about religious history, you would understand that there is no such thing as a peaceful religion. All have had peaceful periods from time to time, but all have been associated with extreme violence at one point or another, even Buddhists, and all to prove their particular deity is the only one that actually exists.
“Well, that’s not the point.”
It is to me.
“Whatever. Look, just quit being so damned one-sided. One week you sound like an extreme conservative and the next week you’re a lefty loon. Make up your mind. Either you’re one or the other.”
I’m neither, and it depends on the issue and the candidate.
“There you go again!”
I enjoy pointing out extreme hypocrisy wherever I see it, and right now I see it on a daily basis from both political parties, but at the moment a tad more from the right, hence my commentary. What you take away from it each week is up to you. I point it out and then you are free to agree or disagree. I sleep the same either way.
“I knew it! You’re a Hillary Clinton fan!”
Do you need someone to read this again to you, slowly, and in a loud voice?
“I don’t get it.”
And you probably never will.
Richard Carnes, of Edwards, writes weekly. He can be reached at email@example.com.