Cope: It’s about habits, not highlights
While reaching into the raging Gore Creek to retrieve my lost golf ball, it occurred to me that there are lessons in this, the most obvious being, don’t hit it in the water. That afternoon, blood trickling down my shin from a collision with a rock, my pedal or the soccer ball bell on my handlebars, I had begun to catalog the life lessons from these activities, both of which I am late to and neither of which I am accomplished at.
The first is that where you look is often where you will go. Just like skiing in trees, where I had always reminded my skiing customers, “Focus on the gaps, not the trees. Life is about opportunities, not obstacles.” This is even more true in golf and mountain biking. Think about that water, look at it, try to make an adjustment for it, and you are bound to end up reaching into it, trying to fish your ball out.
Biking tends to be the same way. Taking your eye off the trail in front of you will, inevitably, result in hitting that rock, tree or other obstacle. Sometimes it’s just best to lighten up on the brakes, let the wheels roll and it just might work out.
We talk a lot about habits in our training sessions with the soccer team. We preach that “it’s about habits, not highlights.” Another of our slogans is: “First you make your habits and then your habits make you.” These apply to golfing and biking as well. The bigger, gnarlier rides are the ones that make you proud of yourself, but it’s the consistency of riding that builds that training base.
Sinking long putts, crushing a long drive and chipping in from off the green are moments that bring you back to play again, but it’s consistently hitting fairways, getting close and leaving yourself in a good position for a tap-in that improves your scoring. Just like in life, the occasional mistake can be overcome if you can avoid the big blowups.
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Ride your own ride, play your own round, and as one of my players once taught me, “You do you.” We can’t control the behaviors and actions of others, so it’s best to focus on our own. As Teddy Roosevelt is credited with saying, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Focusing on the other people on the course, the trail or in life is sure to leave you unsatisfied. Believe me, as a Strava addict, I will obsessively look at Josiah Middaugh’s times with envy. It is far better, however, to check my own times on the same ride last year or last week.
I love watching other people coach. There is always something you can learn from it. Last year, I learned a powerful lesson from Tay, one of our interns from UNLV at the Vail Golf Club. He was coaching a group of junior golfers when one of the boys hit a great shot. His hands shot up in the air and Tay scolded him, “Tyler, you never celebrate until the ball is in the hole.” There is a lesson there about patience and humility.
On the golf course, we can be tempted into thinking that everyone is focused on our round. The truth is that they are equally self-obsessed and we are just extras in their movie, like they are extras in ours. The beauty of golf is that we can all play off of different tees, take our own path to the hole and still enjoy our day out together.
Enjoy the day together, revel in each other’s successes, laugh at our mistakes and offer somebody a new ball if theirs is too deep in the mud to retrieve. We take our own journey, run our own race, play our own game, but we do it together and that’s the good stuff. Get outside, come and see me at the Vail Golf Club and enjoy the summer!
David Cope is a husband, dad, coach, retired teacher and general loudmouth. His wife, kids and dog don’t listen to him, but maybe you will.
