Vail Daily column: Smiling through clenched teeth |

Vail Daily column: Smiling through clenched teeth

Every single one of us, regardless of age, have been forced at one time or another to consume a sheep sandwich.

Some call them turd burgers or poop paninis, but by any definition the word “sheep” is a euphemism for having to feign acceptance of an extremely disagreeable situation.

It’s basically making an unpleasant thing more palatable by surrounding it with a few pleasant things.

And never in the history of mankind have so many found themselves lining up at the sheep sandwich deli to pretend supporting Donald Trump as the Republican nominee for the 2016 Presidential election.

Hopefully they’ll be handing out mouthwash at the convention.

Not to be confused with a sheep eating grin (which hides devious intent), the tongue-biting party is warming up to the idea of a candidate who tweets and retweets garbage, mocks the disabled, fondly remembers when protesters were “carried out on a stretcher,” refers to Mexicans as rapists and killers, has no real idea of how government works and is a draft dodging chicken hawk with misogynistic tendencies.

Other than that he seems like a great guy.

According to last week’s NBC News, their survey put the celebrity rule-breaking radical and his dumbed-down policies and concept-free messages over the magical 50 percent mark among support from potential GOP voters.

Even tea baggers are acquiescing to the reality of the establishment’s effort to sabotage Trump’s campaign or block him at the convention may not only be unsuccessful but also counterproductive and ultimately disastrous for the GOP.

In fact, many uncommitted delegates, and even some previously committed to other candidates, are considering eating the same sandwich to save the GOP from total collapse.

In other words, the same people Trump accused of overseeing a rigged nominating process are apparently willing to destroy their country in order to save their party.

Now that’s patriotism.

While I fully agree that the onion of modern conservatism needs to shed a few layers, I have a feeling the GOP establishment, instead of crying, is laughing behind closed doors because they actually want Hillary Clinton in the White House, not Trump.

Along with the Koch brothers and most of Wall Street, they wish to stay employed, be re-elected and continue controlling their biased systems and pundits who spin their spiel 24/7 about “true conservativism,” meaning informing the ignorant about what and what not to believe.

After all, protecting their personal interests is what most U.S. politics is really about, right?

But beyond that, their true goal is of course to keep control of the House and the Senate, as the president is merely a puppet whose strings they pull.

So grin and bear it over these next 188 days, and enjoy watching the GOP faithful as they add all the lettuce, tomatoes, onions, pickles, mayo and anything else they can toss on to hide the taste of Trump, as either way all the bread in D.C. still can’t hide what we all know is squished in the center.

And it will never taste presidential.

Richard Carnes, of Edwards, writes weekly. He can be reached at

Write a column!

What’s on your mind? Send your submission to

Support Local Journalism