Vail Daily letter: Recovering from grief
After the death of a loved one, a griever may feel that their heart has shattered into a million pieces. She doesn’t need anyone to tell her when her heart is broken. She knows it. She might eat more often or completely lose her appetite. She might have a tough time concentration or focusing on simple tasks. She might sleep more than usual or not at all. And her chest might feel tight or as if her heart has sunk into her stomach. As time goes by the intensity of her grief might lessen, and she might be able to function more easily and return to her normal sleeping and eating habits. Over time some people are able to return to their normal routines, but it doesn’t mean they have recovered from loss. Unresolved grief has a negative cumulative affect on current and future relationships. After a significant emotional loss such as death or a divorce, people alter their life choices to protect their hearts from being hurt again. Have you ever done that?
Here are some common indicators that you are experiencing unresolved grief: Do you refuse to talk about your loss? Do you avoid thinking about your loved one who died because good memories become painful? Do you avoid places that remind you of someone who died? Do you keep the same exact routines you did when they were still alive because you are afraid you will forget them? Your life is forever changed after a loss. There is nothing wrong with grieving, and you don’t have to live the rest of your life in pain. Imagine thinking about someone who died, or an ex, without feeling broken hearted. Imagine living and loving to the fullest. What would that be like for you?
Whether your loss is from the death of a loved one, a divorce or loss of career or health, grief will continue to affect our lives when we are forced to accept the many myths about grief, such as grieve alone or be strong. The Grief Recovery Outreach Program will guide those who wish to resolve their loss issues and move beyond their grief to a richer quality of life. As a result of participating, your life will become more enriched and more fulfilled than ever before. I am a certified grief recovery specialist and I am conducting an outreach program in our community. This nine-week program will begin Jan. 13 from 6 to 8 p.m. at the Edwards Interfaith Chapel. If you are interested in finding out more about the program or registering, please call me at 970-376-8248.