Vail Daily letter: The perfect president
August 13, 2015
The noise from Fox News tells us this: There are candidates on the stage who all appear to bring qualifications to the table, one that will ultimately lead to a position dictating world policy for four to eight years. By way of thinning the crowd via attribute-friendly criteria, I decided to point the way toward a livable prospect we all could agree on. (Not likely.)
Foreign policy: A big one for me. The candidate falling into the plus column should have the following attributes:
• Foreign language and mastery of ideology therein, preferably Arabic. Closest: Rand Paul's sign language in the Senate.
Guy next door: Someone you could approach on the street without too many bodyguards. Clue: Zach Johnson and corn-in-the-auld-mug symbolism.
• Compassion and kindness. Closest: tie with Huckabee and Ben Carson. Nice guy awards.
Most Reagan-esque: Reminds you of your dad, firm but loving, without being too soppy
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• Firm but verify. Chris Christie.
Fiscal discipline: Accounting background with P-W-Coopers. Balance the budget or else.
• Money wonk: Tie with Scott Walker and John Kasich. Do they stay up at night figuring out P&L scenarios for their kids' allowances?
Spiritual affiliations: Must learn to use "God" without actually saying which one.
• Donald Trump. No question he worships money, and says, "God bless my net worth!"
Immigration: Must speak Spanish, well, and know slang when needed.
• Marco Rubio. He also has best story of rags to riches that would make Castro swoon.
Confidentiality: Making sure there are no leaks or breaches (not britches.)
• Hillary Clinton, no contest. As for britches and girth, she wins hands-down (not mine.)
That said, I believe the perfect 2016 president will be Jeb Bush (VP: Carly Fiorina).
We are in an unsafe era in history. Conservatism is best … for now, anyway.
Reflection: The candidates all assert that they stand for this or that, promise to change this or that, squawk about change and taking back America. They never bring up how they will address bi-partisanship and cooperation, winning by majority in House or Senate … or both. None of the change he/she speaks of can be done alone.
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