Vail Daily column: Another ‘meh … ’ Christmas poem | VailDaily.com

Vail Daily column: Another ‘meh … ’ Christmas poem

Richard Carnes
My View

'Twas five days before Christmas

And though the snow finally started to dump,

Many are still reeling

Because of an orange chump named Trump.

Yet relax from despair

At least the election was routine,

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As long as you don't look behind the curtain

Of the Donald's cash machine.

Ignorance is bliss

So the smug people say,

I give it only a few months

Before Congress starts running away.

Dare we look forward to an America

Being handled by Putin,

Or should we all be in fear

Of going the way of Rasputin.

Yes many will accuse me

Of being facetious,

But I am experienced enough to know

When the apparent is suspicious.

Wait, too political, not Christmasy enough…

'Twas five days before Christmas

And all through the nation,

Most are not working

Or at least on vacation.

But not in these mountains

Not here in this valley,

Most everyone is working

For those dollars we tally.

Not lucky me of course

For I am retired,

Therefore I don't run the risk

Of being unceremoniously fired.

Like photo stud Jack Affleck

For 26 years loyal to Vail Resorts,

And was just abruptly booted

For more of Rob Katz's imports.

Many others are hurting

From the death of Birds of Prey,

If they'd only waited another 48 hours

The races would have stayed.

And who thought our own airport

Would be such a goober,

By charging silly pick-up charges

And outpricing Uber.

And who would believe Vail

Would spend like the Bolsheviks,

To have all their Christmas lights

Look like tightly wrapped toothpicks.

Dammit, still too political…

'Twas five days before Christmas

And all through Happy Valley,

The snow makes us shout

Like a high school pep rally.

We truly can't help it

For we love when it snows,

It's the biggest reason most are here

And it's right under our nose.

The snow finally started

Full of powdery fluff,

No matter how much falls

We'll never have "enough."

Christmas in Vail

Is there no finer place,

To escape the real world

With snow in your face?

Yes, we love the mountains

Pines covered with snow,

No amount of negative news

Can ruin our festive glow.

Sure, the world is a mess

And all seems in trouble,

But we're safe and warm

In our Rocky Mountain bubble.

This is the one time of year

We're all nice to each other,

Sharing food and drink

With politeness we smother.

So be careful with legal pot and booze

And even if you end up in jail,

Remember there's still no better Christmas

Than one held in Vail!

Much better I think

Without the body politic,

And I hope you enjoyed

The 17th Christmas poem, by Dick.

Email Richard Carnes at poor@vail.net.