Skieologians: the summer series

Well, this should be interesting.

Saturday morning will be one of the first times since late October that I won’t be out on snow cross-country skiing for the daily workout. Instead, I’ve traded the Speedmaxes’ for my archaic aluminum 29er mountain bike. This “original gravel grinder” is a model-T compared to today’s highfalutin all-carbon speed demons, but … it works. I wouldn’t say it gives me a real competitive chance; my standing in the cycling world makes Rich Strike look more like the 2007 New England Patriots.

The point is, May is typically when I use short rides to work my way into summer training. This year, however, I’ll be jumping right into the middle of the lake — without floaties.

Outside Events Cycling Series (formerly Roll Massif) recently announced a nine-part cycling series featuring the most “iconic courses in Colorado and New Mexico from May-September.” The lineup includes five road rides, two gravel races, and two 12-hour mountain bike races. This year, I’m going to attempt all of Outside’s events, starting Saturday in De Beque (pronounced “dee buke don’t chya know” according to my “How to Talk Minnesotan” guide.) with the Wild Horse Gravel.

I’ve always believed, and I say this with the sincerest form of flattery, that there is no better way to develop intimacy with your surroundings than painfully grinding around all of its quiet backroads as your skin turns into a brown raisin. Now, I know not all of these are exactly in our backyard. They’re more ‘across the street’ from Vail. With an ambitious and talented bike community picking up the Vail Daily each morning, consider my detailed race reports fodder for your own fascinating in-state bike bucket lists.

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Many of these rides — the Copper Triangle or Crooked Gravel in Winter Park — have been on my wish list since I moved to Colorado. I have documented proof.

My cloud footprint would exasperate Al Gore. Polluted by the reckless annual creation of hundreds of race calendar options dating back to 1998, my Google spreadsheets — thanks to amazing technology — can be shared with important people, like my wife, as long as I have her email. Come to think of it, she recently created a new address, claiming she “needed more space for photos of our daughter.” The planner of the family, she is forced to graciously ask every couple of days, “Are you racing somewhere this weekend?

With many events canceled during the pandemic, chasing Fastest Known Times (FKT’s) or performing arbitrary made-up challenges like ‘Everesting,’ became all the rage. Presently, race fees and travel costs aren’t the same drop in the bucket they used to be. Alas, when the possibility for a good story exists, you go for it, but, for those readers with no interest in donning a race bib, I have something else we can work together on to collectively kindle the inspiration flames.

I’m supplementing Outside’s official events with my own 2022 Seder-Skier summer series: an off-the-wall, made up “go-out-and-do” list of inspiring (or psychopathic) arbitrary athletic challenges. If you want to wake up early, drive to the trailhead, sip coffee with me and try your hand at the day’s task, I’d love the company. If you’d rather read about my trials in a follow-up Skieologians column the next day, fine. If you want to come up with your own challenge and write me about it — even better!

They say if you put it on paper, you’re more likely to follow through. I’m wondering if putting it in the paper simply means I’m more likely to be embarrassed.

Wish me luck.