Buff on the bluff | VailDaily.com
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Buff on the bluff

Compiled by Allen R. Smith

While standing at the line-up bell one beautiful spring day, we noticed a minor commotion in progress near the bottom of the Mardi Gras run. Closer inspection revealed that a nude male skier had been apprehended by our safety patrol.It was such a beautiful day that the poor fellow couldn’t resist the temptation to ski au naturel. However, in formulating his plan, he made two grave errors. First, he was not a particularly accomplished skier and after enduring numerous falls on the corn snow, he suffered from a variety of cuts and abrasions.His second and most costly mistake was letting his buddy carry his clothes while skiing behind him. As it turned out, the friend was a skier of even lesser talent than our naked friend. Like Mr. Nude, he also sustained numerous falls and after each one, lost an item of Mr. Nude’s clothing. Mr. Nude was the first one to make it to the bottom of the hill. By the time that his assistant arrived, the only articles of clothing left to hand over were one gym sock, a pair of goggles and a neck gator. The rest were scattered all over the Mardi Gras run.Faced with the decision to march back up the hill to retrieve his lost clothing versus making a run for his car in the parking lot, the safety patrol solved his problem for him.They issued him a citation for not having an improperly affixed lift ticket and gave him a ride home in the back of a security vehicle.- Bert Probst, Holiday Valley Ski Resort, N.Y.The boot racksBack in the days of leather laced boots, ski shops would routinely clamp their wet rental boots into the bindings overnight to prevent the toes from curling up while they dried. In the morning, they would fit the customer with the appropriate skis and boots, put the boots back in the bindings and send them on their way.One day, while waiting for my beginner’s class to form, I noticed several new skiers walking out to the snow in their stocking feet. They were carrying their skis over their shoulders with the ski boots still secured in the bindings.Once they reached the snow, they inserted their wet, stocking feet into their boots. After lacing up their boots, they stood tall and told me, “You know, there should really be a better way to keep your feet dry.”- Mark A. Anderson, Cannonsburg Ski Area, Mich.Vail, Colorado


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